I always figured rock bottom would've involved more hookers
You're the only person I know who would be upset about making out with a girl you like. You're like a drunken Charlie Brown.
I'll be in my room with a breakfast burrito at 2:30. It's up to you...
How was the party? Lets put it this way: "He wants her dick" was a factual sentence stated last night.
We fed him just...so many bright colored crayons when he was blacked out. I hope he looks at his shits because this could be all for nothing
I think Saturday night will always be a mystery to me, except for buying an excessive amount of birthday shots for everyone and yelling BIRTHDAY SHOTS before every shot.
I feel like a pizza delivery girl of vagina tho
Nothing wrong with a few meaningless hookups. Keeps the mind occupied and the body satisfied
How's my sex life is me mastubating next to her dog. that's how it's going.
learned the hard way that breakfast jack daniels is a lot stronger than lunch or dinner jack daniels.
Well yeah. But im not sure i trust the black out drunk high girl giving life advice
why is there glitter IN my vagina????
I'm not sure of this happened or if it was just a dream... But I vividly remember you walking down the street naked?
No actually I had socks on...
I need to start dating older women. We tried sexting and she used more emojis than actual words. It was so bad that I did the math...her messages were 54% emoji. No one should make me feel this old when I'm only 28.
She said cowgirls can can pee standing up and proceeded to pull up her dress and drop her underwear.
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