Pretty sure that Albanian broad gave me something last night. Now we play the waiting game.
He needs to realize that there's a big difference between "I love you" and "I love your dick"
he bit the head off a dead goose for 5 beers. this is my future boyfriend.
Even my psychiatrist thinks I should fuck the married guy.
Yeah well margarita Wednesday already came twice this week and it's just now Wednesday
The sun and I are not on speaking terms this morning
My chest smells like french fries. Get at me attractive men.
At this point, if I'm not getting fucked by a man in ONLY cowboy boots, it's not worth it.
Just gave candy to a strange child. Not my best move.
But seriously. What possible excuse could I come up with to ditch my parents on Christmas to go fuck him?
Our sub is singing "i believe i can fly" after yelling at the class this whole time and this is really hella weird
carb up bitch. we're drinking with football players.
I may have interrupted sex but im bringing them both to McDonalds. Am I not the greatest older sister ever?
Just paid for birth control in all ones do you think she is judging me?
I just saw your mom take a body shot off an undergrad, please tell me you're somewhere near by.
Randomize
