the roller ball on my blackberry is the closest i've come to touching a clit in 2 years.
I didn't take her seriously until she snorted that ramen noodle flavor packet...
She was mid-sentence and then BOOM the hammock broke off the tree. I about pissed myself. Hot Sprite and Vodka make the world go round.
I just used cruise control in a 25 zone. When will this hangover end???
I mean you can't really blame him. He's named after whiskey and I don't get along with pants.
i was really disappointed no one would drink beer from our cleavage last night except for us
I had sex with a Dutch boy on a rock last night. Happy graduation! x x
We need to step up our tailgating...they're here drinking out of a prosthetic leg
Discovery: there is a folder in my pictures labeled "Your Name and cats"
I'm dedicating this beer to drunk texting
But I'm currently thinking of all my bad decision making last night and giving myself a time out.
I WOULD NEVER LIE ABOUT SOMETHING AS SERIOUS AS SABADO GIGANTE BEING CANCELED
Currently on my Sunday walk of shame. Should I go to church?
I'm sorry. I slept with him again. On the plus side he's got better at it!
Hi, I put a dog in your house, I hope it's yours.
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