did you know you can prarie-dog a fart??
the threesome consisted of him fingering dana while i laid next to them watching how i met your mother.
Now he's lighting his socks on fire
I found a tip from a dart in my bra this morning
They really brought out their best strippers for vday weekend
All I remember is him trying to go down on me, but I guess I was too busy making out with his brother
He once got bit in the face by a dog and still got laid the same night. He owns Memorial Day Weekend
It was like a square peg in a round hole... I've never seen one shaped like a stick of butter...
I hooked up with a guy that had a beard last night felt like I was building a fucken log cabin
But that's fine. Because I am an independent woman who is going to pull some jane Goodall shit and save the world one day......or be a porn star......either way they are going to wish they had fucked me.
My brother just text me asking if I was ready for the blowjob of my life.
Bringing my mom Taco Bell and weed. I'm such a good daughter
Can someone explain to me why guys are so fascinated w their dicks that they feel like they'll die if they don't send unsolicited dick pics
Life if anyone rolls up to my funeral with shitty weed get them out of there
only 4 hours until nug lovin time
excuse me?
nug lovin. lovin nugs.
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