Funny, my mom didn't get it when I said 'that's what she said' after she said 'it's so thick, it's impossible' in reference to my milkshake
the bottle said: caution extremely flammable. so that was my motivation.
He wants to know how I lost my bra in his pants....id like to know too
I think I just used lyrics from the Sister Sister theme song to let a guy down easy...
Is this girl REALLY making a smoothie in the bathroom right now?
I drank it. I drank the beer from '78. I drank my bday beer, I drank my soul
IM FEEDING MY CAT ALL THE HAM
This heat and humidity do not mix with these braless DDs and a tank top at a BBQ.
guys with girlfriends don't have a leg to stand on when they get mad at you for fucking other guys
I HAVENT SEEN A PENIS IN 5 WEEKS I REFUSE TO REMAIN CALM
I think I just got drunk texted by my psychiatrist
I probably shouldn't be taking relationship advice from my side piece...
Wait, there's no way I said I would suck his dick. I know drunk Katie.
No, you told him to suck YOUR dick.
See now that sounds like drunk Katie.
She said she was sorry for rolling around in her own vomit. Honestly, I thought it really added to the party.
He goes "what would you say if I told you I like to get it in?" def a potential soulmate right there.
Randomize
