I would kick you in the vagina but I'm afraid I would lose my shoe.
My mom make sausages for dinner...and all I could think of was your dog's penis..
imagine playing with puppies while we're drunk.
Like... we could film it and put like, "do you believe in magic" as the backround song and it would be complete joy.
my three year anniversary of no dick sucking is coming up. you can throw me a party with a penis cake.
Look I'm sorry I shaved your cat, but get over it.
Just made hot dog dorito pasta. It happened.
They were lying down in the parking garage pretending to be speed bumps...
That girl gave me her number because you were arrested. I am so proud of you dude.
I don't know if I have the sustained energy level for partying hard
Not a choice. You are mistaking my comments as options. My statements are facts. This is what is happening.
oh dear god, that would be like watching to female walruses mate. We need to stop going to that lesbian bar...
THERE ARE SO MANY ALCOHOLS IN MY BLOOD RIGHT NOW
Is it sad that I planned a a romantic trip to dunkin donuts for and with myself on Saturday, then added an equally romantic after midnight stroll through the half off candy sale? I find that worthy of adding a few cats to my collection agree?
In my life time, I want nothing more than to get a blow job while watching Space Jam.
If my dildo had feelings, they. Would've deffinately been hurt. He put that toy to shame..
He has the fingertips of a God
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