my boob sweat smells like rotting zombie flesh
is this your pickup line?
new low, shannon just screamed FUCK THE IRISH to a 10 year old's face then proceeded to throw a hotdog at his parents. I think its time i take her home.
Im a photoshop master, i successfully reduced the size of the pupils of all the girls I made out last night with to prove they were not that drunk. So glad the camera goes home with me.
Mid thrust he tells me that we have bio together
As it turns out, strippers don't accept checks.
No, I've only ever seen his brother's dick. So when I have lucid sex dreams, I just do a little cut and paste in my mind and stick his bro's package onto him.
They got me high and left me at the mall with a giftcard for $400. I need an adult.
Your little brother is asking me for an "expert opinion" on his dick size.
I've justified worse with less. I had sex with your brother because he was wearing a nice sweater
preface to our conversation: my vagina hurts.
So, when I got arrested, they fingerprinted me. I'm getting my nails done right now and I'm pretty sure he's filing off my prints. Worth the $30.
Well I took a spicy wing shit in a field this morning.
It's nice out. . But after I almost put a bag of chips in the microwave to make nachos. ..I figured it best to not venture too far from the couch
they saw the dick pic he sent and started calling him 'subway'
We're friends with benifits... The benifits being I'm fucking her boyfriend
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