Also thongs make me have to fart a lot.
When I asked if she spit or swallow she replied "I never learned how to spit"
three words: i give head
three words: not that well
IM SAVING ALL MY LOVE FOR YOU
I don't want it.
he wanted me to put the condom on for him. I was high and couldn't figure it out.. so instead we played xbox.
He sent me a picture of his ass and said the backdoor is open. Almost grabbed my keys and a condom before I saw it was a group text. Not nearly drunk enough for his desperation.
Who's nuvaring is under my pillow?
Last comment. I know of no exercises, diets or practices out there to help keeping balls young and healthy. They simply succumb to gravity.
Everything smells like blood and olive oil.
IF WE WERE REALLY BEST FRIENDS FOREVER YOU GUYS WOULD AGREE TO A WATCHING A PORNO PARTY
THERE IS WEED IN MY OVEN. HOW AM I EVER SUPPOSED TO MAKE CHICKEN PARMESAN WITH WEED IN MY OVEN.
Quick, I need a picture of your dick. Don't ask questions, just show me your genitals.
My 1st STD. I feel like there should be a cake for this.
If the people you’re with use the word tequila in a sentence with phrases like hair of the dog or breakfast of champions...run awsy
You ate all the burritos in sight....I cant take you to mexican restaurants anymore
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