There was so much of it... it was like he poured a bowl of pudding on my face. It's not bad for your hair is it?
tan lines, throwing up everclear on the beach, doing lifeguards, tequila...summer.
Just remembered to take my BC at the liquor store. Just swallowed it with a free sample of Whiskey.
It's a big world.....someone has to fuck it.
So he told me he didn't have a condom, paused, and then said "so, pulling out" and tried to high five me.
i woke up in the fire place with a lighter in my hand. if i would have died the night would have made up for it.
If I am going to pay someone to make me puke, it's going to be the bartender.
You take your time. Wallowing in last nights filth is the best way to get over a hangover
My mother is a bitch. She just outed me to my dad. He wants to meet you by the way...
We smoked with this guy who looked just like Hyde from that 70's show in an alley. It was a divine moment in my life.
He seems like a lot more than a waste of tequila
Now everytime I sit on a toilet I think about having sex with him. Great.
There's a rash on my genitals that would like a word with you.
He drives a PT Cruiser.... that should have been my first clue.
Actually, my eyes didn't start bleeding until the next day. So it was a pretty awesome night overall.
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