the last thing i remember is fucking her. GAME CHANGER i woke up in another bedroom to her younger sister blowing me
Joe decreed the livingroom and the hallway up to the burn mark his kingdom. I think this is the point of 'stage an intervention'
I told him I would only take his calls if he was dead, dying, capturing a midget, or buying me shots.
I stand by my new policy.
I just saw him carrying his little sister while walking his puppy. And he was shirtless. I swear my ovaries just exploded
he was too drunk to climb up my loft. i owe my beating teen pregnancy to four pieces of steel
If you don't want me in your apartment then lock your door better
Moments after comforting her about her boyfriend issues I found myself in the other room showing him my tits.
If I had really thought it through, I would have bought some Depends, popped one on and made this night my bitch.
Do you remember biting my ear and whispering quotes of Pride and Prejudice last night?
Had to sacrifice my vibrator batteries to the thermostat gods. I had a dirty dream and also almost a heat stroke.
bring the pregnancy test and the margarita mix, see you in 15
Last night was just a whirlwind of Mario Brothers and sex.
Am I under any obligation to let my new fuck buddy know I slept with his little sister?
I don't know, we got really drunk and I slapped her with an ear of corn.
Um. I just realized I still have a beer in my purse from last night. I'm at work. I am so classy.
Randomize
