32 messages asking me to suck his dick. And there for a minute i thought i was desperate. ha!
Hahahaha
make that 40.
So she couldn't stop dragging her teeth while she was blowing me.
Ahh dude, that fucking sucks, what'd you do about it?
Decided to drag my teeth while eating her out... She got the point.
if i wake up one more time on my porch im gonna start considering myself homeless
stephanie tanner's voice is so fucking annoying. no wonder she resorted to crystal meth.
After I saw you grinding on that guy with your shirt completely unbuttoned, I figured it was time for pizza.
The pride tent is doing free lube tastings. There is also a mechanical bull.
Well were gunna have to wash the couch cover now...maybe even the couch, soap or fire your decision
I kinda wanna eat your hands right now.
Put down the everclear and go to bed.
Nothing like running into your favorite bartender in the middle of the afternoon while stone cold sober and being told your grabbed his penis the last time you were at his bar. My bad.
Why is there an ambulance refusal in my pocket? I'm never going drinking with you again.
A conundrum I think only you would understand: how to classily post "I need a ride to the liquor store" on one's Facebook wall?
The sex was so bad. I kept sending people snapchats of my face during it.
This is the third time this year I've whored myself for a Netflix login. If this guy changes his password, I'm gonna fucking give up.
Or maybe pay for Netflix?
I'm not that desperate yet.
All I want is a hot dog on a Saturday at 2:19 is that to much to ask?!
He's literally cuddling with the washer and dryer.
Randomize