I Bought a bracelet with bible characters and a charm broke. the virgin mary one. Do you think it's a sign?
the real housewives of new jersey finale is tonight. it makes me wish we had pot.
I walked in on my roommate finishing watching something on his computer. There was cum all over his screen. He awkwardly said hi and pulled up his pants.
We need to talk in the morning. The guy I was with just interpreted me taking off my earrings as code for "let me take off my pants."
Last night Brynn convinced every person at the party wearing glasses that they stole hers, and she woke up with 8 pairs of prescription glasses in her bag.
Nhdgh I love you very much hello becausevs. Vagina pensiono
currently hungover, lying in bed and cutting cheese with my drivers license. ashamed? not even a little bit.
It was so weird. I had like an out of body experience. I heard the moaning, but I didn't know it was me.
Just come back with most of your limbs...and your dick. Please and thank you
No, I did not fuck him for football tickets. I fucked him for tickets to the superbowl. I'm not that much of a slut.
Well, I'm at the grocery store wondering whether I exist or not.
I mean thanks for the bj but i wanna forget everything that happened last night between 11 and 5
Id like to submit an apology whenever you feel like talking.
Its not gonna be for awhile Im not a very forgiving person especially since you TOTALED MY FUCKING CAR.
I used your vibrator when you were out of town. Now I know why you always come out of your room smiling.
Just checked out of walmart with a 30 pack of Budlight and a wiffle bat. Hello, Monday night.
Randomize
