I need to shower the guilt off of my thighs.
so pretty much your parents know your seeing a girl on the side, let her come over and just dont say anything to your girlfriend?
Glad I put on jeans. You could measure my ass sweat with a rain guage.
He burst into tears while I was blowing him. NEVER giving a bj for a graduation present again.
I see you've set aside this special time to humiliate yourself in public.
I think it may of been me pulling down my pants is why she walked away.
Apparently after awhile self preservation trumps libido. This is new news to me.
The boys wrestled in the living room for the last condom while the girls chanted, "THE LAST MELON."
I received a sext from my girlfriend, and a deal for free chips and guacamole at chipotle at the same time. I have tasted heaven, and it is beautiful.
Saved a second guy who was crying/on the verge of wigging out. Just call me the drug whisperer.
I think he's holding my wallet hostage because I puked in his car. It's not my fault he has child locks on his windows..
Not too bad but came home early cuz business was shut down due to an employee sexually harrassing the inspector
Props to you. You took the bet seriously. Making out with her for an hour right after she spewed
I'm sitting on your porch drinking wine from the bottle. Just so your new neighbors know what kind of people are in the neighborhood
Is there any reason why a taxidermic donkey head is in the shower?
Randomize
