Ummmm the art teacher neighbor asked me to pose nude for her art class for cash.
She went to college and exploded out of the slut closet.
Please don't tell anyone I peed on your wall.
News update: stealing a playground is harder than it looks.
she said she could "feel the heat of my groin" against her. ruined the whole fucking moment.
make sure to take notes today. there is a guy in a wheelchair who might be getting a DUI from a cop on horseback. I'm gonna see this through.
just threw up in the bushes outside my lecture hall. sometimes i hate the freedom college gives you.
I feel like I'm in a bed a bagels and mistakes.
She is crazy, dude. She actually bit me on the gootch.
I guess I fell on the bar and kept trying to get back in telling the bouncer that I left my teeth at the bar. Woke up this morning with chipped tooth
I made it with a guy dressed as Mitt Romney. I told him "you can't have my vote, but you can have my body"
I did not get laid last night bc my condoms were too small. I'm allowed to be dreary
As I was puking, these 2 guys started peeing next to me chanting me on
last thing I remember is yelling 'sit on my face' through a traffic cone
even my drug dealer wished me a happy birthday before my mother did.
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