Where are I am going home with Ryan
I don't know who this or Ryan is but it is probably too late to talk you out of it
Vibrator and massage oils got stopped at security. Super.
i just ran into my boss at the liquor store. we didnt exchange words, just nodded in mutual understanding.
I just realized I'm not towing a trailer. I thought this whole drive home I was towing a trailer. Wow too high
At what point did we decide It was a good idea t have a wheelbarrow race in the parking lot?
I think i can hear god laughing at me and yelling "thou shall pay for thy habits of underage drinking" through a megaphone directly at my eardrums
Bro, he broke his neck diving into a kiddy pool.
Note to self: Don't go home with a recent divorcee. Semen and tears.
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
I may or may not have pissed on my floor last night
Welcome to 22
What's goes good with Everclear?
Pepto-Bismol and a sandwich.
There's nothing more rewarding than telling you that I fucked your dad
Would you accept a fantastic blowjob as payment?
Just puked in a cup. Poured it out the window.
EVERYBODY CALM YOUR SHIT
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