Tell me why I go to the dollar store for nail polish remover and a ghetto black dude trys to hit on me in the parking lot, then he gets in line behind me with a dousche bag literally and that is his only purchase.
i wish i could watch tv and lissten to music at the same time...but still understand both
i think otters can do that
one more question, do you know why i woke up with 5 pounds of quarters, nickels and dimes in my pocket?
they almost convinced me to put "Funbags" in the 'other names you may be known as' section of the job application
Im so hungover that my 6 year old cousine made me aspirine and coffee out of playdoh...
It's not just about fucking anymore... We decided we're actually in like now..
I literally had to tap out of the blow job. It was like a pornographic wrestling match
Yaaaayyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy! It has more than one y so my intentions to sleep with you after the drink special ends are clear
i went to the 24h massage place last night and brought down the price for a hand job from $50 to $12.75 and half the big mac left in my bag.
Thank you for caring about my cervix.
REWARD BLOWJOB!! STAY RIGHT WHERE YOU ARE I'LL BE THERE IN FIVE MINUTES.
I've been vomiting all day.
All day? It's 10am.
I had a glass of wine for breakfast. It's gonna be a rough week.
Honestly the prospect of dick really lifts a girl's spirits
I am now gainfully employed. Parents, lock up your children.
Yay! Welcome to the world of "you're seriously trusting me with your kid?"
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