yo i just woke up i feel so weird, and the absolut is still fill, so is the 30, what the fuck did we drink last night man? And will you please come out of the bathroom.
Bro... we didn't even hang out last night??
new low: my hungover self just mistook bacon grease for mashed potatoes. worst. mistake. ever.
And next time, don't pick a fight with me when you're naked. That's just not fair
it feels good to walk into a CVS and not go straight to the pharmacy counter for plan b. its been a while....
it's official, after last weekend my girl number is higher than my guy number. fix this.
Also, the wait staff kept prematurely clearing my Manhattans. Not sure if it was an oversight or a hint.
I take your lack of response to mean that your hands are taped to 40 ounces of something.
You refused to get in the cab so we rock paper scissored to decide who walked you home and the fat guy was it. So don't blame your poor hook-up choice on me; it was all you.
I think it's safe to say taking shots on the way to the emergency room was rock bottom. We're going to need to think of ways to top that between now and next new years eve...
Ugh. This is the type of hangover that all other hangovers want to grow up to be.
Someone please drive out to my house to bring me a beer.. There are some in the fridge but I just can't get up
I don't think a gay three way is the best way to confirm your sexuality.
tom claimed she had a star tattooed around her buttonhole. i am not prepared for this era of skankyness
I'm hungover during 4th grade graduation practice. I AM THEIR FUTURE.
Ah you cut my boxers off with scissors, we're way past introductions
Randomize
