My little brother has some high school girls in my pool, it's like a jailbait buffet in my backyard
so i realized that everyone figured out i was a slut before i did. then i realized that no one felt like telling me. sometimes i think you just keep me around for entertainment.
you're right.
Her brother was practicing the clarinet....it was like having sex in a starbucks
I woke up and we were making out. So the good news is that after two years off the market, I haven't lost a step. I'm picking up girls in my sleep now.
shouldve known this week was gonna be bad when I threw up in my coffee mug
Excused from finishing the term project because my lab partner got arrested. For the second year in a row. Public school, I love you.
He compliments me like a gay guy and fucks me like a starved nympho. I'm in love.
It's like salsa. But with balls in it. I like to call it balsa
thought the power was flickering out but it turns out im just blinking
I just tried to text you by typing "whoa" into my contacts.
Or stump rather since he's possibly large. Large penises don't have tips, just blunt ends of battering rams.
I can't blame him for thinking that then, placing a cone shaped potato chip on the tip of his penis post bj is not a normal act of love
I think I pulled a muscle in my tongue.
sorry? thank you? I love you?
I've officially slept with/dated two guys that have gotten tased. What the fuck is wrong with me
You are hungover. Your arguments are irrational an incoherent. We only played twice. Have some Gatorade and take a knee.
Randomize
