The Worst (noun)- 1. Getting up at 6am after a night of drinking. 2. Wearing a Peter Rabbit costume.
Dear everyone. As mark stated i did the 'piss n run' last night. This is all new to me and it scares me. Again, sorry. "if i could turn back time" -cher
She rubs her butt on the bed & then she growls..
See it, we're so close, i smell your vagisil
We found your brother, passed out, floating in our pool, with a bottle, on a blow up mattress. How did he mange to walk 2 blocks and get into our backyard?
So he handed us the weed then asked us if we needed any papers. And she goes "i dont know what that means, do we need to sign something?"
Its so hard looking at my mom and pretending I'm not dying a slow death of binge drinking
he said he did everything he could to puke on his nurses because they were doing everything wrong
Thats admirable.
Taking my underwear off at work was one of my better decisions this weekend
And then my hands went numb and no one believed me so I started putting peoples cigarettes out on them. Shitty idea i'll tell you that much
Model at car show < day drinking with your favorite sister. Get your head in the fucking game Christopher.
With 4 extra seconds dedicated to the dong.
These kind of text worry me.
I'm excited for him and his new girlfriend. I'm just going to miss his penis is what I'm saying.
Well now you know my birthday fantasy: gangbang consisting of men wearing NPR pledge t-shirts.
He spilled some of his beer on your shoulder then proceeded to lick it off. By the face you made, I don't know if you were completely horrified or really turned on.
Randomize
