Plan B is the new Plan A
Does getting a boner while watching the celtic women sing opera on ETV make me cultured?
He literally didn't stop until I lost count of how many times he made me orgasm. It took three hours.
They're here. One showed up as a slutty Crayola, and I think the other came as The Fat Friend.
I call it my summer of slut; except summer lasts from May until December. It's been incredibly successful
She tried to cook Velveeta IN the oven on clean mode.
I'm doing lines by myself in the kitchen. I think your outside. yeah that's you. your naked.
The bend and snap? 98% success rate of getting attention. When used appropriately, it has an 83% rate of return on a dinner invitation.
I was hooking up with him and then someone banged on the door and shouted "When you get the chance, will you put the weed on the veranda?"
I'll be the Broncos and you be the Seahawks and you can pound the shit out of me.
I think my ball sweat smells like waffle house. might be time to change up drunken eating habits
Something I never want to forget. I'm in a porta potty and she is outside knocking on the door going "You're a queen. You're a queen. Never think any different"
wow bdsm is so cute
..needless to say, i got fired. But I'm in the parking lot tanning on top of your car... so its not all bad.
Well, I like big penises but it's not like he walks around with it out or anything so yes I think he has beautiful eyes
Randomize
