don't worry, i have a range rover and a brother hopped up on steroids.. we can solve this little misunderstanding quite easily.
Last night we hooked up in nothing but out UK shirts during half time. Never say I'm not a dedicated fan again.
At one point I was double fisting both beer & ice cream. I love public events in this town.
I should just tell him this. He doesn't need to be all nice and ask me on dates and to do gay stuff like hangout during the day. I'll still sleep with him regardless.
I feel uncockblockable...banged her in the bathroom with my iv still in
He is crying over the toilet and his friends just came in and tried to make him take another jello shot.
Nothing quite like pre-gaming the Kentucky Derby with adderall and adderall. I'm fairly confident I could outrun all of these fucking horses in a foot race right now.
I just made SCOTCHSICLES. no further info is necessary
Dear Jesus. Send me strength to not suck cock this morning.
he's like watermelon oreos; I know they're gross and weird and I shouldn't like them, but I can't stop eating them because they're there.
The sex was so good I feel like I could run a triathlon, hit big at the casino, and defeat ISIS.
Sooo i'm debating posing nude for the drawing and painting classes, I just wanna see if they draw my nip ring.
Be there in 20. Want icecream?
sex. I want sex. I like where your heads at though.
We took three cabs to get home, the first one dropped us off a block away, so we went back to the hotel and tried again
It's starting to get sad how I have this 'new beginning' feeling after every negative pregnancy test
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