woke up to the trail of sugar cubes leading to my bed........was i that uncooperative last night
and hes going back to rehab like me, so we have common interests
We have a drunken confused pantless man in our apt. Boots.
and then you seriously asked him to senior prom..which freaked him out since you told him earlier you were 22
I wanna throw up and cum in that order
I'm in this weird masturbatory haze making onion rings. If you want to come over we can eat these suckers and play TF2.
Why don't we hang out more often?
I just feel like everything is too perfect
He's probably a serial killer or chronic masturbator
Or both. Which is common
Everything is just really out of control. I hear puking from three different parts of the house. Roger has black eye from being punched. Kaiser tried shaving his head, but somehow burned himself. Music is bumping, but everyone is either puking and calling out for help or blacked the fuck out.
Haha keeping the dream alive until Chinese New Year. I'm jobless with stitches in my face.
My purpose is to unleash drunk self on strangers, i believe as some terrifying icebreaker, otherwise i too would offer my driving services.
We got stuck in traffic in the tunnel while we were smoking weed. We were afraid to air out the car.
I feel like my dick pic collection should be archived at the Smithsonian
I have a few Facebook friends I only keep around for quality control purposes on Tinder
honestly, you deserve someone taller anyways
poll: am I friendzoned if he just called me brochacha? on one hand, he called me bro, but on the other, he used the a to make it feminine.
Randomize