garbage
garbage dick
rubbish cock
you win
There's a girl in here wearing a kaballah bracelet and a miley Cyrus tshirt. consider her judged.
Shes in the fridge organizing my beer collection. I love having a girlfriend with OCD
i'm sorry for cheering you on when you were making out with him. i was just celebrating the fact he was decent looking for once
Why did I think it was so necessary to steal that rolling pin?
I haven't seen any of my friends sober in months. We have classes together.
Power hour was a bad idea. It turned into power 4 hours, then power puke. Then power sleep till 3.
I need to pack up my vagina and leave. We only do bad things together.
I really want to fuck that guy in the full wind breaker suit
She was totally amazed that i had the pizza delivery timed to coincide with our nooner and that the delivery boy knew where the broom closet on the 3rd floor was.
Currently looking up Winnie-the-Pooh porn.
Turns out end of the world sex is H-O-T, HOoot! I'll be the only progressive lady smiling today
Sorry, i'm on a strict diet of vodka and regret
He's throwing Skittles into my cleavage and some are rebounding into my crouch.
Well he's scoring either way then.
I smell of tequila and Im going to a funeral. This is my life.
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