remind me next year to leave the 19 year old girl at home when you're going to pride. total cock block
so my dad walked in on us having sex
lulz really? why?
lets just say he wont be answering to 'daddy' for a loooooong time
bro i finally banged her last night on our basement couch
I'm at this frat party right now and yelled "my little 16 year old brother finally lost his virginity." They gave you a standing ovation
He just lit his joint with the tiki torches around his pool. He is definitely coming to my future parties
theres pictures of him knuckle deep in her, both of them thumbs up and cheesin. someone should take her kid away
Someone posted a printout of my tits on my door this morning! Where did they get this photo!?!
i meant to type that i went to that party for shits and giggles, but my phone corrected me and said for shots and goggles...either one works
Halloween is the end of the singles holidays they don't start again until st. Patrick's day we better get wifed up or it's going to be a long winter lol
Also, totally got laid in my yellow rubber boots and it was awesome.
After the apocalypse all we'll have is vodka and twinkles.
Sometimes I think he has a hidden camera in my vagina so he knows what I'm doing and saying at all times...
This is the perfect outfit to do ketamine in, I must say
I've decided I will have no shame for the things I don't remember doing.
If everyone felt the happiness from apple crown royal we would be in a better place
When have you ever know me to go too far?
Besides the alcoholism, the HR issues, and getting fired from Best Buy for tackling a display?
Yeah. Besides those.
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