id fuck shawn from boy meets world only if we could name the baby topanga.
ask if his dick looks like a sausage. alex's bro told me that's a sure sign. btw took pain pills. maybe shouldn't listen to me.
She ordered a salad and a budweiser. I love her.
There's a point around the one and a half minute mark where the keg stand goes from impressive to pathetic
the party has pretty much ended, it's just 20ish of us jumping and grinding to music from some guy's phone in the corner.
i ended up playing naked naked monopoly and hangman with my dealer. i really love my life.
do you know where my other puke covered boot is
Some older looking guy gave me his card as he exited the train. Hes a pharmaceutical rep. I'm debating asking him for a job. Obv he wants sex but if I can get a job out of this maybe I can offer him more than a cheap dry handjob bc that's all I'm really up for these days
She pulled me up to my feet by my hair. I thought it was you for a second. My drunken angel savior.
I was all, oh. I've had tattoos and broken a limb. Waxing my lady parts will be a cake walk. I was wrong.
His dick is a skeleton key. It fits everywhere.
Tears For Fears is the only thing getting me through life at this moment.
Just used the pen i got in my signing ceremony to pack down my bowl. coach would be proud
It felt like I was on painkillers mixed with Molly mixed with the sinking feeling I'll die alone. 10/10 doing again.
I came twice AND he sent me home with edibles. I think he’s a keeper.
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