I need to just get drunk and eat a pot pie.
i cvme to yuor rooom...wherer are youf?
please be gone before i get back
i'm laying naked in your bed you should probably come home
move.
You are an asshole
haha sleeping beauty awakes.
Where did you find this costume?
I was desperate so I downed my birth control with balsamic vinaigrette...
now you know why we've never bought a 12 pack of king cobras before.
Jon thought he was that blonde chick from Three's Company when he was shrooming
i don't think i ever formally apologized for that time i threw up on your dog.... well...here it is...
Mega depressed bro. Had the greatest sex with the hottest girl I've ever seen and in the AM she gave me that look I've given dozens of times. I'm her drunken fat chick fuck
If she says "This is how acid feels" one more time I'm never trip-sitting them again.
I am going to borrow your water/shock proof video camera for St. Pattys day so that if wake up next to the highway again I know why.
Ok but I hold the right to any footage of you getting slapped, puking, anything with body shots, and allowed to make a montage of it to put on youtube.
Slip and slide hallway was not one of my better ideas.
I made it with a guy dressed as Mitt Romney. I told him "you can't have my vote, but you can have my body"
I plan on showing these boobs to so many people that by the end of it ill just have a shirt of beads.
He got me off while watching hockey. He's a keeper.
Randomize
