it was like he was trying to blow his nose in my vagina
Totally forgot this... How weird was it when they were licking our faces
My last google search was 'bulk asian wives' I don't know either
somedays, I wish the drugs you give me would convince me they were a bad idea preingestion.
where's the fun in that?
Your subconscious sucks. Mine is awesome. I have a recurring dream where I manage a chocolate factory run by big titted hookers.
A) you're a liar. B) that would be awesome.
You're not supposed to support this behaviour, btw the judge recognized me
Hardcore start to spring break. Mike is wearing adult diapers because the only stop we are making is for gas.
The plan was to get laid... Now the plan is to survive.
i projectile vomited shoeless at 7:30 a.m. in a taco bell parking lot. never again.
You just managed to turn Doctor Seuss into a sext. I really like you now.
I feel like an involuntary Mother Theresa. I DON'T WANT TO BE ABSTINENT!
masturbating on the freeway is more stressful than it sounds
You could cut the tension with my nipples.
I wrote him a note at the end of the final. I'm hoping I can flirt my way in to an A or B
Yelled "don't taze me bro" as the police officer tazed me. Cross it off the list.
Randomize
