no, there's no challenge. I live a humble lifestyle out of virtue.
You wear Armani Exchange.
i either just walked in on pete wacking off to webmd or he was checking his dick for herpes
i wish every aspect of life was like a bar. flirt with the cute guy two feet across from you and get whatever you want for free
i wiped a booger on my final. end of semester present.
My farts smell like St. Pauli Girl. Last night was too much for a Monday.
lets make a pact to never make a pregnancy pact
fuck that im pissed. when I come back im ripping forskin off.
I'm going to call you, don't answer. Need to practice moaning to your answering machine again
so hungover. I'm actually considering eating the snow off the roof so I don't have to leave my bed
Is it bad that I'm a 32 year old woman that is so afraid of commitment that a hamster is too much responsibility?
It's probably not healthy how legit bummed I am that my bottled of wine is gone.
I had to say goodbye to one of my fuck buddies last night. He's voting for Trump, we shouldn't be doing it anyways.
You KNOW it was a good night when you find French fries AND taco remnants in your bra when you get home...
Will you still call me Bond when I'm sober?
last night I used snow as a chaser
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