my mom asked me how i could steal on a clear conscious and i told her it was because when i was younger she let me watch alladin and he did it.
Why is it that you only get to have sex when you haven't shaved your legs in six weeks and are wearing period stained granny panties?
At what point did you actually think that you could throw knives safely?
just walked past the recycling bin in class, there's keystone cans in it. go cougs.
I'm staying in tonight, it's my Christmas present to my liver.
He's def the type to chop us into bits whilst screaming "NAPA BITCH". AKA my type
Anxiously awaiting my period drinking Hershey's syrup from the bottle. Don't judge me
I wasn't a groupie because I didn't carry his guitar home
Once again I am on the toilet and refuse to get up
What a great time to reflect on life
Ah well. Drinking wouldn't be drinking without mystery bruises
Agreed.
I think I've been inadvertently participating in a contest to see how many times I can show up to work hungover in my first year of teaching. And I'm the only participant. Not sure if I'm winning or losing.
Good luck. While you're suffocating on a dick, I'll be eating pizza rolls. Being a good girl.
I got fucked in a bat mobile this morning. Being slutty rules.
Then it hit me - his penis wasn't a shiny new toy anymore and I wanted a new one.
Is there a sexuality term for 'only wants hatefucks'?
Randomize
