Shit chicky whatchu wearin rt now, ur skins?
Oh dear, kinda... in ur sweats!
U look good, r we getting naked in ur car?
pissed the bed twice, first one side then rolled over , other side. boom.
I've been awake for 20+ hrs. What does that mean? I just realized if BSB were Twilight characters, Brian would be Jake and Howie would be Edward based on the video for "Everybody". That's unsettling.
It's unsettling that you took the time to think about that.
could you grab mr moo while you're at his apt?
you brought your stuffed animal to a booty call?
i swear to god her finding her clit was like looking for a sock in a dryer full of beach towels
They are literally fucking next to the DJ Booth to a techno Remix to Pacman. She is going waka waka waka. WHY ARE YOU NOT HERE FOR THIS?!
oh no, im for sure still drunk. i wana eat evrything in the fancy feast commercial... everything
Help. Me. He just whispered 'prepare yourself', & sprayed hairspray everywheres to make sure the 'air was crisp'
Smoked before work and just remembered i left pringles in my desk last time i was high. SCORE
I'm laying here half naked telling him I'm eating gold fish to change the subject of hookin up cuz I don't wanna put pants on
I found my weird threshold when Truth or Dare became everyone get naked and snort Adderall off the kitchen counter.
He keeps asking the karaoke guy to play let it go from frozen so he can sing it in a falsetto
I put a bagel at the end of my bed so every time I want a bite I have to do a sit up
I can't go to Fassler and not immediately think about you licking a guys wife's butthole in the family restroom
It was like mission impossible.
but with sex.
Randomize
