He said he only talked to me because I talk dirty in bed.
my friend asked What a UTI was in front of everyone, letts just say his girlfriend was a lil pissed
The glockenspiel player has some booze though so hopefully the ride won't be that bad
When I don't want to forget things I put them on my cigs.
C smoking isn't all bad
You said that you were drinking out of a pan, and then went on to apologise to 'Jesus and all the other guys' for drinking on a Sunday.
Na Im fine, just need to un-grow this vagina I've developed
I just did a shot of Jameson and two shots of cuervo. Note: this is the moment things went down hill
I think it was a smart move. Quickest way to get over a guy, hook up with his friends.
Should I take a fireball shot or brush my teeth?
See, this is why we give you shit. Ashley gets her car cleaned out, I get multiple enchiladas made, and you get cum in your eye.
I said "one day" and that day is not today
Ugh I realized he only responds to my snaps when I’m eating a popsicle
Why are male brains so small?
You were only speaking with either thumbs up, thumbs down, or high fives haha
Even after hearing me fuck his friend twice in one night, he still follows me around like a puppy.
She demanded to see my stimulus package, I had to go over.
Randomize
