just got pizza delivered to the hot tub. its easier than i thought to be this lazy
The guy I was getting with last night took off his purity ring mid-sex and threw it across the room.
Next guy we share better have a little more dignity than that
New rule : you aren't allowed anything . Ever .
Heb just said, and I quote, "let's go to Who's On Third and fuck a fishbowl with our mouths. I am going to fuck this van." and then he humped a van.
No longer is one of my lifelong dreams to ride in a kangaroo pouch. You have eternally ruined that for me. Thank you.
Sex on the scooter in the parking lot wasn't the smartest idea. Actual quote from the cop as he handed me the ticket and fist bumped me.
Yes... I'll kill two birds with one crazy ecstacy filled night.
Must say, as a couple, she and I are thrilled that our pretend lesbianism has paid off.
I seriously think I may just have to live here. In this bed. Naked.
I'm at that point in my life where keeping an extra pair of underwear in my purse is normal.
Thank you for trusting your ovaries to me
I threw up in the shower. I cleaned it all up and there is on mess at all. This hangover has become borderline religous. Powerful and life changing.
I don't think "growing medical marijuana" is Quite what my Grandfather had in mind when he thought me about gardening as a child
Finally fucked my buddy's mom!! We are both ten years older and for her it really shows but i hit it!!
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