I just found a porn show called cleavagefield. no i am not watching.
I saw his package. It spoke to me.
We just all danced like dinosaurs in the center of the dance floor.
my ass hurt today after the party last night. I wnt to the doctors and they found a coin in a ziplock bag with a note from you. WHAT THE FUCK DID U DO TO ME???
It's 8 am and he's already trying to get me to make out with a girl.
All I remember is yelling RUN as fireworks started going off in the kitchen. Who said that was a bad idea?
He got drunk and insisted on licking my eyeball and called it a test of my trust in him.
im just going to wait until i dont feel like the grim reaper is having sex with me
Her dog trainer Fuck buddy is over here again. She sounds like a squeaky toy and he talks to her like he talks to the dog. I CAN HEAR EVERYTHING!!!
I don't want a mention or even a whisper of a Shakespeare Festival by that or any other name including, but not limited to, a fucking Renaissance Fair. Are we clear? It will be a DEALBREAKER .
I'll have you know my trust issues and my daddy issues are two COMPLETELY different topics of conversation.
watching spice world high feels so wrong yet so right
It looks like you got dick slapped by the sandman..
You know its an epic night when omar the garbage man gives you a ride home at 6 in the morning.
I just deff did the walk of shame.. His roommate/manager woke us up. A dog scared me on my stumble to the car.
This is why I'm single.
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