Her body is shaped like a coke bottle...a two liter coke bottle
Becky drew a cock on my face and is making me sit on the step.
what did you do that she drew a cock on your face and supplemental questions why did you let her?
I just peeled a layer of cum off my eyelid. Don't even tell me that's not why you came over
I woke up with her little sister yelling "she's dead !!" from the bathroom doorway.
he tried to convince me he was a seal.. sound effects included. and then asked me to 'be his lady seal'.
I don't care how many kiddie pools are in our house. One is too many.
You know how I got mad at him for making out with his formal date? Apparently I fucked mine. I'm guessing any exclusivity is out of the question.
Its bad when you wake up with a penis drawn on your face. Its worse when you find out its traced..
You did it first. I was merely expressing my support for you, by pressing my testicles against a window.
Bring a bathing suit and your good liver.
My good liver is still at the dry cleaners. Will my backup liver suffice?
Maybe
Now some guy that's in my phone as " Alex lip ring hot" is texting me and I don't where life is taking me
All I know, is I had green sex and beer and got driven home. That's it.
Well, he asked what my sign was, then proceeded to critique me on my beer pong stance... I really need to raise my standards.
Me too...I'm driving to work trying to figure out if I put my pants on the right way.
Blacked out and showed everyone my nudes. They toasted to my nudes, and I got an outstanding ovation.
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