I just applied for an unsubsidized loan naked. I love the internet.
i had a headache and asked the kid next to me for aspirin. he gave me esctacy instead. gotta love college.
needless to say, I hope she has to get an abortion again
I just sold my mom a dimebag. Should I feel scared or sucessful?
So..I walked into his bathroom and found a bong and a blender in the shower.....normal?
Level of drunkenness: just now when I sat down on the toilet, I had to double check to make sure I wasn't sitting on somebody's lap.
Hold my feet while i lean out of the window of the truck.
Just put a dog collar on someone's child.....was a great hit with everyone but his mom.......I think she hates me. I'm okay.with that
I love flavors. My neighbour is owide smoking and so am I. I'm adio boooooored and I need an adult.
So were u tired or drunk when u wrote last night's text message?
pills.
ugh he was not leaving in the morning so i tried to scare him by crying and saying i wasnt ready to lose my virginity.
I've been on this train for an hour and this women has been on the phone and all she's said is "guuurrrrrlllll, gurl, gurl." I may commit suicide.
I just watched some guy take a shot of jack Daniels, chase it with a shot of ciroc & then violently rip his pants off. You have to come here.
Look, you don't know disfunction until you've sat on the john taking a shit and crying while totally sober.
I never thought I would have to arrest my own parents on a sunday night
No we were too stoned to stop you from wiping the peanut butter all over the car.
Randomize