I was just like staring at the lawn boy while singing "You Belong With Me".
I am the king of creep.
So im going to watch Hocus Pocus in my footie pajamas... How am I in college?
are you looking for your table cloth? Cause I found it around my neck this morning...
you kept naming everything at the party...like "boy i'm going to make out with" and "table i'm going to dance on later"
I think we need to stop being best friends, its not good for our vaginas.
now I know why they wanted me to come. apparently gay guys are stripper magnets
Btw, I'm creating an event on fb to celebrate the one yr anniversary since we went to jail.
Our new goal for this summer is to fuck so hard we lose his security deposit.
this dude just showed up to the party with a falcon
There's "red head", "preppy white girl" and "the two Asians I dated and now everyone thinks I like Asians"
Your dating history is like the united colors of Benetton
I just sneeze out a chunk of leftover pickle I threw up last night. dont you try and tell me your day is going worse
You kept ranting how Captain Planet is getting shortchanged in the superhero department. Other than that you kept it together
decided to jump from one of the levels of the Westin chicago Nortghwest. it was worth the broken legs.
Lesson Learned: It's not a party until someone pisses their pants.
We still on for Manwhore Monday?
Randomize
