Canada is now making docos about life in America. Its called Trailer Park Boys.
just read twilight to her over the phone, while in the bathtub, candlelight...i'd love to say no homo but that was so gay.
she was seriously choking and the whole time all he kept saying was "that's what she said"
Responsibility does not care about your dick.
All I wanted was a quiet evening to masturbate and eat cake and instead you ruined it by bringing girls over.
What color suit is the proper "i banged the bride" attire?
just walked across campus with a bottle of champagne in between my boobs. night two and the quest for classiness is already over
It was Thanksgiving sex. I was thankful for it. Need I say more?
I seriously doubt this is the first time pumpkin pie has led to a booty call.
I'm pretty happy on the couch eating Popeyes and watching Cops so if I go over there you better have drugs left
I'm way too sober and people are way too heterosexual
like I'd leave you in a situation like that..pfft. what kinda friend do you think I am?
...a stoned one.
Fuck you. Fuck this party. I just wanted to be pretty with a cute little tiara and boys sucking my tits, now i have a hangman game drawn on my face and jello shots in my hair.
I wanted to give you a great birthday party. You know I did.
Do I masturbate or eat a pound of matazah. Alissa help what do I do??
She grinded so hard on my face that I've got rugburn on both eyelids
Randomize
