I don't hate you. My dick is upset with you, but I don't hate you.
i just got cum up my nose. i would have expected more from the captain of the men's lacrosse team
You wrote me a letter and I cannot make out anything you wrote except the last sentence which says "tell the wolf ill meet him at sunset and that I'm sorrry"
Ita all starting to make sense i need vodka like i need air
He's in the hospital yelling at his brother to at least have stuck something "normal" up his ass.
Again?
I can't help that I bring out the sex in people
Just burnt my tongue. Not sure if it will help or hurt giving blow jobs
His idea of a night out is drinking beer in the driveway. He's been on house arrest too long
I'm done, I have no more memes or ways to ask for nudes, so yeah
I’m pretty sure I have teeth marks on my neck
I would like to reiterate that I went to give lessons and ended up having a three way instead
I just found a ladybug shell in my underwear. What was I doing last night?
Did you happen to find the other half of my bra last night?
Did you mark a random day on my calendar as National Seth Day?
Sounds like a legit day to me.
I'm gonna make out with this 38 yr old. Mark my words. I don't even have daddy issues.
Randomize
