"you've got the devil in yuh. the curse of Jesus is coming on your sex soon." That's what a homeless guy just told me.
ok i said sorry. what else do you want?
100 blowjobs
dude, my own friends sent me home from a party last night. real cool assholes. real cool
Part in the USA is on your top 25 most played on iTunes. you have NO RIGHT to judge me.
yeah my mom told me she knows when i come home high because i use my turn signal while turning into the driveway...
we hate each other therefore the sex is mindblowing
I would invite you but we are high and there is an AK-47. Not your scene.
My google history shows every combination of "red lobster cheesy biscuits" possible.
She's all pretty and bubbly and nice and I'm sitting here stoned looking like Lucifer.
No, no. The rest of his everything inspires me to put his dick in my mouth
Just text him and be like do you want this pussy or not. You have three seconds to respond.
I'm over here willing to be the Yoda of fucking but I guess he just doesn't want to be a Jedi.
Is there ever a non-asshole time to play the "I was a child prodigy" card?
I just spent 100$ at a sex shop to make myself feel better. And I signed you up to win 200$ so if you win, it's mine. And yes I'm serious.
My eye was non-stop itchy for like an hour... I thought burying my face in your ass caught up with me
Randomize
