Culvers...So Good
So good. The butter burgers slip right outta my ass.
I like how you formally end text interactions, just turn your phone off or don't respond you pervert
Happy hour is for amateurs. Been drunk since 1230. Fell asleep in a disney viewing of UP. Went to the roosevelt and drank more. Now im stumbling around the grove.
Don't be a dummy cum on the tummy. Make her a slut, and cum in her butt. Have no fear, jizz in her ear. Don't be a noob, cum on her boob. Forget her rack, blow on her back. Just take off your coat and jizz in her throat. And if she seals off her holes, cum in her rolls
is that a poem?!
im using old socks as coasters. im going to make a great housewife.
That was like me applying to a law school drunk at 5 am
Hahaha. That's funny.
But I got an 18k dollar per year scholarship
Over 50% of the drunkest nights I have ever had began with me saying "I'll just drink my dinner" to you.
you got into a really intense arguement about protecting bees. it was wierdly arousing.
That jawline could fucking have its way with me.
its 11:20. i'm drunk in class flying paper airplanes for my final. what the fuck is my college experience right now?
I'm fairly sure I accidentally saw my dad naked last night
you had her IN YOUR BED NO PANTS AND YOU GAVE HER THW BOOT?!?!?!
Stage five clinger bro. had to go.
Didn't think I'd be dancing with the Power Rangers but here I am
I’m literally naked drinking a beer and I gotta leave in 6 minutes for work lol
Only good thing about being an essential worker is that I have a letter allowing me to cross the bridge into jersey to get booze
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