Plan B is the new Plan A
Where you are. You must stay where you are are
Where you are. You must stay where you are arewhere are youu
Where you are. You must stay where you 5eare wher are you!!
I wish "capable of destroying an innocent girl's life" is something I could put on my resume
Just had a drunken guest at my hotel threaten to "throw a fuckin fireball at my face"
I woke up alone at my apt. On the floor with the door wide open, but still. Success.
He sent me a pic of his Junk. He said it was a Brett Farve valentine.
He offered me a ride home but i walked. He lives by an elementary school so a 10 yr old safety officer helped me across the street during my walk of shame
Think I can pull off edward 40 hands before class?
You might end up in the wrong class.
I'm a COM major, they're all the wrong class.
OH MY GOD I JUST WANT TO GO HOME AND FART ALL NIGHT.
Pretty sure my idea of standards went out the window when I hooked up with a guy who had a rooster tattoo with an arrow pointing down to his no no bits. Think about it.
Did you know they have a bouncer at Applebee's because I did not
I mean of all the things to be cockblocked by, Taco Bell is pretty high on the list
His face matches his life choices. Both are train wrecks.
That's MADAM THUNDERCUNT to you
My professor just told my lab he could drive us around town in his 1991 Lincoln towncar limo for our bar crawl. This just keeps getting better!
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