We glued Jenga blocks together, called it "magic blocks" and sold it to the stoners for $50 and a bottle of Henny
I think a used vibrator from amazon.com is a great valentines day gift foe my ex.
noooo, I woke up on his pack porch and the SUN WAS RISING. I saw red lights everywhere and heard sirens so I just ran for my life.
I have no idea what's going on.... I just want to wear my horse sweatshirt and drink vodka.
Nicee. Atleast your phone doesn't change pen in to PENISsSSSSSSS like mine does
take 2 Ambien then drink a Red Bull and watch Alice in Wonderland. Trust me.
I told you I'm not going to the Phillies game until we're tripping balls
Found a grenade pin. Still no Dave.
Robert just walked in drunk, grabbed my Jameson from me, told me to let him do his thing, and spilled it all over the coffee table. Then he told me to grab a funnel because he was going home.
I'm 50% sure my cousin put weed in these deviled eggs.
So I totally just used margarita salt for a body scrub.
Just from watching vine I come to conclusion that all pornstars are dog hoarders.
You could totally spank that new found Catholicism out of him.
I saw the president of my women in business club at the bar last night...I was gonna thank her for teaching me the business skills to create my own fake to get in... then i decided not
I think there is cocaine on my toothbrush.
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