Maybe she gives good head
A girl who still calls a dick a "wiener"cannot possibly give good head
words of advice: black light parties reveal cum stained clothing.
It's a good deal. He teaches me how to longboard, then we have sex
Yeah well my vagina has expectations too but they don't get met all the time.
My Mom printed off all of my Augusts text messages. Apparently I've been drinking WAY too much and having an intermediate drug problem. I have to go home everyw weekend for the rest of the semester
Dude she flew me 1000 miles down to see her, broke up with me 7 hrs after arrival, and kicked me out with a week left til I fly home. Thank god college taught me how to shack up
I'm microwaving a frozen bottle of Two Buck Chuck while watching The Proposal with my housemate. I'm not sure what success is like, but I'm fairly confident this isn't it.
I'm hungover and surrounded by children and Republicans. What did I do to deserve this?
I need to stop ravaging the freshman dorm like a virginity-snatching dragon.
As if finding out the man you just had sex with is married isn't bad enough, it gets so much more awkward when his wife comes in to comfort you...
You put your finger on my lips and told me 'the butt is nature's pocket'.
I don't remember that at all, but I stand by what I said
You just said the word 'slut' out loud in your sleep and then made a moaning noise
IDK I WAS CAUGHT UP IN THE TEQUILA SHOTS AND FRIENDSHIP
Did I literally just offer a blowjob for help moving? Yes. Yes, I did.
He saw me naked after our first date and still asked for a second.. so I think we’re doing good
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