I just found 22 drunken videos and 4 naked pictures on my phone. We'll start the bidding at $5
I woke up, not remembering how or when or why i was even there and looked over to find Steph spooning with an adult black man.
The mystery has been solved. Seagulls have sex doggy-style.
I can hear her blowing you man. All I hear is her saying 'yeah' over and over again.
No, this is non-alcoholic oatmeal.
I woke up in my living room, on the floor, wearing nothing but a fur coat?
Why are you taking pics in the bathroom with the plunger? I mean you still look hot and I'm totally going to wack off to it.
They were arguing about who would hit the piñata first so naturally you tore it open with your hands. You broke the piñata and their hearts.
It may not have seemed like it to you, but I was very sad that I was cheating on my GF with you. I was crying on the INSIDE.
I'm scared because his knowledge of star trek is turning me on
You can't die you're my only democrat family member
you told me you wanted to be a soccer mom with a high tolerance then you put the bottle to your face
She slapped a big dramatic bandage on my arm and people started buying me drinks...I plan on wearing a full body cast tomorrow night.
Why do I always have at least 8 men with whom I am conducting some sort of poorly planned love experiment?
I didn't really understand how big 10 inches is. Now I know.
Randomize