I guess what I'm trying to say is you've fucked more people than the economy.
there is a priest convention in the hotel. i feel like god is laughing at me.
he yelled "RELEASE THE KRAKEN" then hit me with his dick
I didnt shave my beard last night, so I could feel it while Im shrooming today
Lindsay lohan: road to jail is on E tonight. Bring vodka we are not missing an opportunity to make a drinking game out of this
Just had such a rough shit, don't stop believin had to be played
Doing lines of coke through pieces of licorice. Because I can
I didn't ask for a picture of your soft dick.
After seeing all of the pics during the trial, all I could think was "her vagina doesn't look THAT dangerous"
NOLA update. Went to Corey Smith at the house of blues last night. Drank PBR and took lots of shots of Jack. Too drunk, cabbed it to the hotel and fell asleep while having sex. Not my finest moment. Now I'm in court. I can't wait to be your attorney.
I just want someone to shove bread from panera down my throat
at one point, i told him to buy you a pumpkin spice latte and uggs because you're a common white girl and that's how he should get you in bed
Summary of my night: made out with a complete stranger at a club dressed in the Geico gecko costume...
Why would you get kicked out?
Well, an overweight man is currently not wearing a shirt. Or pants. And is getting in touch with his inner Chippendale. You can probably fill in the blanks.
its 4am. iam sitting in the luggage car of the train eating beef jerkey. i feel like a hobo.
dont insult. no hobo is as pathetic as you.
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