just prayed to lady gaga in hopes it will help me pass my fashion merchandising final...what is my life?
I woke up in what appears to be a taco bell graveyard in my bed.
im just laying here pukin in my mouth and swallowing it 'cause im WAY too lazy to actually get up and find a place to vomit. this is my life now.
Also yeah I would definitely have to say that one of my favorite things to do is to get high and pet cats.
We're going to catch a squirrel this summer
She kept pulling joints out of her bra and asking strangers for birthday hugs.
WHY IS IT FROWNED UPON THE DRESS UP IN CAT COSTUMES AND SIT OUTSIDE OF BARS WITH A BOX OF WINE I THOUGHT THIS WAS AMERICA
Me and my bruised tit have to wake up at 4 AM.
I woke up naked buried in snacks. Best night ever.
Stop acting like the Lucky Charms you're feeding people is actually ecstasy.
I bought a mink out of the back of some guy's van on my walk home from the bar yesterday
I woke up in a bush somewhere in Tucson with a full suit on. Great way to end my birthday.
You use your abs way more than I realized. Btw multiple orgasms is the best thing I've ever discovered.
Went to bed still wearing my bralette. When I was changing this morning, a Tootsie Roll fell out. I'm definitely living my best life.
That’s all I need in life: vibrators, butt plugs, strawberry lube, and sour gummies
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