Those balls look pretty dangerous.
the best part is my dad got arrested for the same thing at the same bar 30 years ago... so he cant be mad
He looks like Ryan Reynolds from this angle
Since when is drunk an angle?
Fine then. I'll just do all this coke on my own this weekend and die. It'll be strictly your fault.
we were walking and you spelled the word "oats" to prove you weren't drunk.
I just watched dragonflies fucking. You can't match that level of geek.
Pretty sure I scared him off for good. The lesbian in me is ecstatic.
How interesting! I'm adding this to my list of things to discuss with you between fucks.
sriracha body shots, that's gonna be a thing
it's like you just said "i want you to suffer"
He tried to puke in the 14th hole and when I told him to stop he started chanting "hole in one hole in one"
Maybe she'll change her mind but the "go fuck yourself" doesn't seem promising
The best thing about this time of year is that all I have to do is add a random mardi gras decoration to my cart full of alcohol and boom, no more judging
I'm supposed to be at work in 10 min, I just woke up and am 45 min away...tinder for the win
This is the best thing we've done since that time we started a religion
I FOUND A VIBRATOR IN MY BABY BROTHERS ROOM. IM FREAKIN OUT MAN ITS BIGGER THEN MINE
put it back and chill out ok
NO FUCK HES 15 WHO EVEN SOLD HIM THAT HES A BABY
Randomize
