508, what difference does it make? You were alone, anyway.
is not sure whether or not everyone at the club last night calling me a-easy is a good thing?
we've already established he's totally wasted. but now he's just sitting at his computer, doing i don't know what, and he keeps saying "dammmn girl" in a really low whisper
Peed in a church parking lot last night. As if Jesus didnt hate me enough already.
he was so drunk I had to hold him up and he started crying when he heard an ambulance siren and said "is that for me?"
If it's any consolation, your boobs looked awesome.
I'm sorry I tried putting my balls in your cup holder.
My god. His mom just smacked my ass. Does this mean I'm accepted??
Was my shirt on fire at any point last night? Because I'm fairly sure my shirt was on fire.
I want to go to a gay rodeo for my cross country road trip. It'll be like my very own homo country boy pilgrimage to the holy land.
somebody went from crying while watching Full House, to a full on emotional raging bull...I love this time of the month
I'm at the level of despair that only Panda Express can fix
I know I joke about running from my problems a lot but I'm 3 miles off-campus and need a ride
Don’t say some truly stupid shit like that to me. In a kitchen. Where the knives are kept
I had perfectly good intentions but my penis had other ideas and now I need a place to crash what do you say
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