I miss you like a fat girl misses the prom.
I told him it was like a man's penis, but smaller.
About tomorrow. if it dosent fit dont force it. Just pushit as far as you can and i'll wiggle the rest of the way
I just randomly started counting the number of guys that I've hooked up with that are now gay. 11.
I just met his wife...she told me they have been having marriage problems and are spending his paychecks on marriage counseling...then she cried on my shoulder...NOW i feel like a bitch.
I am VERY upset that you called my fiesta a waste of time.
My password hint says "not sunset, also facebook." i need to stop doing computer things while high. I will never figure this clue out.
Just pull your dick out and wink at her, its a game changing play
Its only 9:11 and I just somersaulted through a window. Its gonna be a good night
Just got outta the drunk tank! Happy 21st birthday!
hes that one kid that offered to spoon after staring at me for 5 minutes
Hungover playing piano at a baptism I am the PICTURE of class I feel like I should be struck by lightning
He wants to pour butter pecan flavored coffee creamer on me and lick it off. I'm like, dude, gross. French Vanilla ok? Ugh.
Only thing that feels right is being horizontal in the fetal position
short story short, i just screamed anal seepage in the middle of a diner.
Randomize
