And my awkwardness continues. I felt the need to send him a text that said roar. I did it.
We made a drinking game out of poaching eggs. When did our life turn into a really awesome version of Top Chef?
I made a mac n' cheesicle. Better in my head than in real life. Gonna keep smoking to see if it gets better.
It was the first time I had seen his penis when it wasnt hard. It just looked so vulnerable and a little bit depressed.
I started dry heaving in the middle of sex and she says "You moan funny."
This kid is too lonely to be my drug dealer.
All i have left of him are the magnum X-Large condoms he left in my room, knowing full well that no other guy I hook up with will be able to fill his shoes. He taunts me.
chugging beers on the train. people are staring. I would be offended if it wasn't 8:30
and if my full six pack comes in by Halloween there is no stopping the man slut costume. I have no shame
Yeah, you gave me a condom that I 100% coulda used, then an hour later you basically beat the shit out of me and physically took it from my pocket.
Pro: Drunk Portland Strip Club. Con: Monday morning hangover at work. Pro: boobs. Con: Sleep deprivation. The Pro's are winning.
I would agree. Add some coffee to the booze. It will cut down on sleep deprivation.
I woke up and found piles of popcorn in a trail around my house, ending at a laundry basket full of pillows. What were we trying to catch last night?
Are you seriously getting this frustrated over a hand-job right now?
So it's official...my sex life has improved since Pokemon came out...
It was great. He never spoke.
That's not why it was great, just that's all I remember.
Randomize