strike ten. I need to stop drinkng
doing washington apple shots with my mom. sunday afternoons suddenly got so much better.
i feel as if last night was a right of passage. to officially be an adult you must have a drunken one night stand with a co-worker and go to work the next day still drunk wearing yesterday's clothes...
Just tried to tap morse code on the wall seperating our beds to tell you I was awake and ready to smoke
He's taking me to Burger King to celebrate losing my virginity..
Im so excited to get permanently banned for life from all the old bars again, it is gonna be christmas after all
I dont know. Theres no way you can be ready for the sex hurricane that will consume you.
i have a queen bed, a cherrywood bed frame, and gold sheets. how are you saying no to me right now?
Are you coming down for 4/20 or does Easter kinda fuck that up for you?
You need to finger her with the Spock hand sign since she loves Star Trek.
yo dude not sure how this happened but im drunk at your house eating burritos with your mom and sister. hope you're having fun in new zealand
Thanks for duct tapping my dick to my leg while I was passed out. I could only aim straight down. I stood on your bed. Have a nice day at work!
he's been 21 for 38 minutes and he's already trying to fist fight this dude over his girl
awwwww babys first drunken mistake
My life is just a trash fire of work and Japanese video games now
What the fuck was I thinking eating an entire tub of potato salad on acid. My stomach today bro
Randomize
