We found her hiding in the bath tub.. And when i opened the curtain she replied "thank you" and walked out like nothing happened.
I've already started drinking so the earlier you get out of class the more coherent I'll probably be.
Is it too forward to say "stop being a good friend and start being a good fuck buddy"
Hope you had your fill for the summer my friend, because all the cleavage has been put away for the winter. Fear not; it blooms again in May.
She's calming us down by shoving oreos in our mouths
This is where you say "Why yes we will drink with reckless abandon and hopefully not be in a church parking lot again."
Finding that toy duck there was weird right?
The boys wrestled in the living room for the last condom while the girls chanted, "THE LAST MELON."
I think id rather titty fuck an A cup than deal with what happened tonight again. shits depressing
Ok let me just clear up this blowjob thing first so we can talk about your grandpa
Do you understand how hard it is to go down on a guy underwater? Didn't think so....
I just want to braid flowers into his hair and steal all of his pills.
But if I live with you I'll help pay rent. Only if you promise no 50 shades of what the fuck internet hookups
Come over. I have beer, your weird ass vegan pizza, and a raging hard on.
Marry me.
Found out my grandpa had two wives and found out I'm eligible for some internships 11/10 would do acid again.
Are you playing pokemon in the dark and sexting? I can't be mad at that.
Randomize
